If My Words Could Speak

the musings of a peculiar poet….

Days 6 – 9

Ok… so don’t pay attention that you are reading these entries on Day 9…. o_O  just know that on days 6 through 8 this is what your girl has been thinking and contemplating on….  I will finish up my Flight Turbulence Part II later on this week .. perhaps on Day 12. So I shall call this entry ” I Digress” because that is what I am doing… to a point trust me.

How many of us start something and never finish? We have wonderful ideas… we attempt to get everything together for a roaring start then we run out of gas and don’t follow through to the end? (raising my hand ever so slowly… ) YES! This is or shall I say  this can be me . Yeah … mmm hmm. I realized this one day during my transition to a new place. I was sorting through the “keeper’s pile” and I noticed that I had a ton a notebooks with ideas for either projects, books, movies, songs you name it! I could see that I would get these spurts of creativity and start writing these wonderful things down to fill up maybe 5 -7 pages of the notebook and then nothing. NOTHING! I even found myself getting revved up again after reading some of those things but quickly got disappointed with myself because I could see there was no follow through … no completion.

Now I can go through a ton of reasons why that could be for you or someone else BUT I’m being transparent about me with the hopes it can help someone.  So I meditated on it for a moment…. oh and BTW I love pens too… new idea… new notebook .. new pen! :-/ So ok… I had to trace why I kept repeating this pattern. What feelings and/or expectations am I putting on myself etc in the process of creating or doing what it is I KNOW I am supposed to be doing and it dawned on me…

Hello my name is VMarie aka Thr33 and I have a fear of reaching my Destiny!

Yes the very thing that I said I want sooo badly — to live and work in my DESTINY. Ok let me repeat this again….  I have a working fear of the very thing that I thought I was striving for. What is this? This certainly disturbed me because if anyone knows me you would know that one of my deepest passions is to inspire others into their greatness into their destiny … and here it is I am afraid of this very thing?

You know I am a stickler for words so let’s define Destiny.

des·ti·ny [déstinee]

(pluraldes·ti·nies)

noun
1. somebody’s preordained future: the apparently predetermined and inevitable series of events that happen to somebody or something
2. inner realizable purpose of life: the inner purpose of a life that can be discovered and realized
3. Des·ti·nysomething that predetermines events: a force or agency that predetermines what will happen

[14th century. < Old French destinee < Latin destinare(see destine)]

Microsoft® Encarta® 2006. © 1993-2005 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.
 

When I wrap my mind and heart around this idea there is apart of me that totally understands but then there is this other part of me that rejects this reality. When you have come to the point of realizing what it is that God has created you for that does bring on a bit of pressure don’t you think.. lol I mean come on one wrong move on your part and you could just botch your entire earth assignment! Not to mention all of the people that will now expect to see the thing that you have said or proclaimed as  “your destiny”.  What about the responsibility … oh my! When you go around in circles thinking like that it can only produce ONE thing and that is NOTHING!

Each and EVERY one of us has a DESTINY and in order to achieve it we must accept the fact that although we cannot solely bring it to pass we must however actively seek out God’s input– guidance on how to get there and also TRUST in what He has called us from the very foundation of the world. He called me a writer, an encourager, a dreamer,  a seer, a wife, a mother… and even though at times the responsibility of that reality is heavy and weighty I MUST move on ….. keep moving … keep pressing toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus! Philippians 3:14

Until Next Time …. Bask In His Presence & Be Blessed!!!

 

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